Dorm #4: Second Place Is Still Losing

Charlie was happier than normal to start off that day. She was excited to spend a day with Philip in her dorm. She had it all planned out. The movies they were going to watch and just everything. And Philip was finally going to invite her on this vacation he'd been talking up for several months now. It was going to be so much fun. Of course however Charlie was about to be more let down than she'd ever been in any of her recent memories. She smiled when the door opened. "Hey, Philip!" Charlie said to Philip excitedly.  

"I picked the best movies." Charlie smiled brightly up at her best friend. Her opinion of him though was changing. She wasn't sure what Philip was to her anymore. She found herself trying to impress him more and more, and she hated Kayla even more than before, but after today it would be even worse. Charlie pushed right over so Philip could sit beside her.

Philip was going to spend the entire day with Charlie as promised. But first he needed to go see Kayla. After the summer vacation, which was slightly disastrous with having Charlie and Kayla in the same room, forced by his mother to deal with each other and hanging out with Philip. He kind of enjoyed spending time with Kayla. Well, it was definitely enough to want to take her on another vacation. And enough to develop feelings for her and to consider asking her out. When he went to ask her, Kayla excitedly threw her arms around him and said yes to going on the vacation with him. He grinned happily and made his way to Charlie’s room.

Philip grinned at Charlie. “Hey.” He chuckled then made his way into her room. “Oh? The best movies?” He asked with a grin and plopped down beside her. "And what qualifies to earn the title of 'best movie'?"

Charlie wasn't second place in anything a lot. On the vacation she was in fact second place, but Philip had called her "his girl" so he obviously had feelings for Charlie in Charlie's mind. Of course, it wasn't exactly right. Charlie however, still thinking she was the one going with Philip smiled. "Well right now it's any movie about an awesome vacation..." She hinted with a grin. Charlie was so proud of herself for figuring out that Phiip was going to ask her on a vacation. However, Charlie hadn't come close to figuring out Philip's plan. He had picked Kayla over Charlie. Charlie was second place and she didn't even know it yet.

Charlie snuggled close to Philip. "What excites you the most about this vacation?" She asked with a smile. "Is it the destination? Or is it the company?" She teased, not knowing how embarrassed she was about to be.

Philip kind of gave her a look, wondering what she meant about an awesome vacation. But didn’t think much of it. “Oh? An awesome vacation?” He asked with a raised eyebrow.

He wrapped her up close and played with her ponytail. “Hmm, the vacation itself is going to be really fun. I’m excited for the destination because I’ve never been before.” Philip grinned slightly. “The company will definitely help to make it better.” He was itching to tell Charlie that he was wanted to ask Kayla out. But, he was only going to do so if she was okay with it. He knew that the two of them didn’t get along well at all.
(In later years Philip will remember this moment and realize what a bloody idiot he was. And that he was a jerk for leading Charlie on).

Charlie smiled at his grin. Yep, she was going. She had to be because why else would Philip talk about 'the company' like that. "Yeah? So who is this amazing company?" She teased, it was obvious that she was the company. Philip was going to have such a good time with her she was absolutely positive of it. Why wouldn't he? They were the best friends anyone could be without being a couple, but Charlie had a feeling Philip must have had deeper feelings than friendship for her because of all their cuddling, but mostly just because she assumed that because she cared about him that way that her feelings were reciprocated which unfortunately wasn't the case. "Are you going to ask this amazing company out?" She teased further not realizing she was going to get to answers that would hurt her terribly.

Philip ran a hand through his hair. He knew he should tell her, but he also knew she wasn’t going to be all that pleased because it was Kayla and the two of them didn’t get along at all. He chewed on his lip slightly. Philip flushed slightly. Ask the person out? Wow. It was like Charlie read his mind or something.

“Well, I asked her to go with me on the vacation today, before I came here actually.” Philip was still arguing with himself over the whole mentioning Kayla. But it was Charlie, she’d understand right? “Kayla said yes.” He smiled slightly. “I was thinking of asking her out while we were on the vacation. But, uh, if you don’t like that then I won’t. Kayla said she’d try to get along better with you. She realized she was a bit rude over the summer. But, I want you to be honest because you’re my best friend and your opinion matters to me.”

Charlie collapsed inside faster than matter in a black hole. Oh. Right. Kayla. God damn it Charlotte! Of course he liked Kayla. She was so stupid! Charlie wanted to throw a hissy fit. It wasn't fair! Kayla was a complete and utter jerk! Though, Charlie understood. Philip and Kayla were both purebloods and his mother loved Kayla. Kayla had more history with him. Kayla was more naturally beautiful. Kayla was more sophisticated. Philip deserved her. Charlotte was so hurt, but it was her own fault. She'd assumed Philip felt the same way. Charlie felt like crying, but she had nothing worth crying over, so she simply faked a smile. "That's great Philip!" Charlie said forcing a happy-for-him kind of tone. "You should definitely ask her out if you like her, you deserve someone pretty like her." Charlie knew there were switches in her brain that needed to switch off, but for right now she just needed a wall between them. She used her 'excitement' as a way to sit up and put space between them. However while she was only a couple inches away from him physically she mentally pushed herself as far away as she could. She'd deal with being upset later. Right now Philip needed an encouraging friend to tell him to go get the girl. "Kayla is going to say yes and she's going to love the trip. I'm just sure of it. Any girl would be lucky to have you Philip." Especially any blonde haired girl with a love for computers.

Philip was a complete and utter arse. He didn’t even realize what he had done at all and wouldn’t realize it most likely until it was too late. He didn’t notice anything wrong with Charlie moving away from him. “You think so? I mean, I know it’s weird because my mother kind of reunited us in a way and I don’t usually listen to my mother. Kayla and I used to be so close too.” He ran a hand through his hair. “But, I do like her. I think I’ll do it.” Philip smiled at his best friend. She had given him the okay. “Thanks, Charlie. You’re the best.” He meant it too. Charlie was the best, the greatest friend he could ever ask for.

And the rest of the day went on like that. Charlie masked her deep self loathing at the fact somehow someone as vain as Kayla was better than herself for Philip according to him. When he finally left Charlie cried it out for a little bit before switching off any feelings she had for Philip. She put all of his clothes in a pile and brought them over to his room with an explanation that Kayla might get the wrong idea and that she had kind of grown out of wearing his clothes which Charlie definitely hadn't.

When she finally laid down for the night around ten she still couldn't sleep. All she could think about was how fast a great friendship had been pulled out from under her feet. It had all happened so fast. Hours melded together and it was soon two thirty in the morning. Charlie sighed softly. She pulled her bed curtains shut and did a very dim lumos. Next thing she knew she was writing a letter to Mrs. Bracknell.

Dear Mrs. Bracknell,
You win. I don't really know what else to say. I don't even know why I'm writing you. You hate me. I hate giving you the satisfaction, but Philip plans to ask out Kayla. I know you know how I feel how I felt about him. Don't worry. I don't feel anything towards him anymore besides friendship because I don't need your son nearly as much as everyone thinks I do. Your son is more reliant on me than vice versa. I will never again even think about any kind of romantic entanglement with your son, but I'd like to make a deal. I would still like to be Philip's friend just to make sure Kayla treats him right.
Thank you,
Charlotte Antonin

The letter actually did help Charlie fall asleep by way of clearing her thoughts and she sent it out the next morning. She wasn't even expecting Mrs. Bracknell to reply to her, but two days later low and behold she got a letter.

Charlie looked at the letter for a long time. She must have read it about four different times. It was so right. Philip deserved more than Charlotte could offer. Dating Philip would be a disservice to Philip because he deserved someone who could actually get along with his family.

Charlie felt like she was just an extra cog in the machinery. She wasn't hurting anyone, but no one wanted her around either. Mrs. Bracknell was right. Charlie's only job was to keep Philip happy until they graduated where Charlie would definitely seize the opportunity and move very far away from Philip. She'd open up her own store in England and sell electronics. She'd live like a muggle during the day and enjoy the simple pleasures of witchery by night. It would be the perfect life and she would never have to see Philip again.