Hourglass

Uh... hi,

Just a warning, I have a cold as I'm writing this. So if one hundred years from now, you're reading this letter and you come down with something, know it's just the common cold. Just drink plenty of water. And think happy thoughts.

You know, I sifted through all of these letters and I still have barely any idea what to write in this bloody thing. Should I tell my story? Give advice? Or should I leave it like this and let my mind ramble? I guess I'm going to do all that.

I don't remember much of my life before Beauxbatons. I remember certain details, but not anything important. I think I remember my little brother being born. I think. But even then, I'm a little bit foggy. I'm only three years older than him.

Crud. I hate ink. It's so permanent, you know.

Anyway, I somehow ended up meeting my older brother here. I'm adopted, you see? I think maybe Riley was the first person to open my eyes to the world. Maybe not in the sense that I was more aware of the issues, but more that I was aware of myself.

See, a lot of bad things happened to Riley. And a lot of times, I questioned why. It didn't make sense, in my eyes, that he would get adopted at age nine, while I was adopted several days after I was born. It didn't make sense to me. It wasn't fair. And I guess that's what I've really learned here at school. That life isn't fair, for one, and that being only idealistic sets you up for disappointment. There's a balance between the ideal and the reality. Knowing the difference is essential. And Riley taught be that.

And Riley's teachings opened my eyes to the fact that it is okay to be emotional. He taught me that giving up and giving in were necessary sometimes, which keeps me out of trouble.

Then there's my girlfriend. Kayla is, oddly, almost the exact opposite of me. She sometimes sees things entirely too literally. I wouldn't say that she's a negative person or that she has a bleak outlook on life, but she has definitely influenced my inner realist. I'll say that, at least.

But Kayla probably has had the next most influence on my life thus far. For five-ish years, she was my best friend. We probably would've dated much sooner, but we were honestly both so terrified of telling the other how we felt, that it just didn't happen. It reminds me not to rush into things, but it also taught me that there's a time to take a risk. I can laugh about the whole situation now, but it was still her who took the chance and so far, not taking the chance myself has been been my only real regret.

Being in a relationship with Kayla has also taught me that no relationship is perfect. I honestly don't know what I expected as a young teenager. Obviously, it was going to feel like I could kiss my best friend, but I other than that, I don't know. I guess I was expecting that we'd suddenly agree on everything or something, which is not the case. We still disagree about eighty percent of the time, we just don't fight about it. We don't try to change each other and I think it's a good dynamic. It's honestly better than I expected. I love her more than I did before, if that's possible. But it's also a deeper love than I imagined it would be when I was younger. Love is weird. It's tricky, but it's necessary and worthwhile.

I guess something that you should be mindful of is the fact that it's okay to let people get to know you. It's scary, but opening up is just a good way to get any emotions out and it's also a good way to network. Make connections while you're in school. I now have connections to so many different things by meeting new people.

Also, don't take things so personal. Not everyone's bad attitude is because of you. Not everybody's cynical comments are directed toward you. People's bitterness isn't always because of you. If you ignore the seemingly negative comments, you might make a good friend. I made friends with a girl who just has a lot of issues while I was in school. If I hadn't tried to find the good in her, I would have missed out on a really great friend.

Do I have anything super important to say? No, probably not. But hopefully there is some wisdom in that mess.